I Can Feel It

Summer is still on the calendar but fall is just around the corner and I can feel it.

Sure, our forecast has temps in the 90s and even the 100s for the next seven days (let’s be real, I can certainly feel that), but there is a shift outside.

The clouds hang differently in the sky, which itself is changing its shade of blue. The crops are highlighted with golden hues, ripening for harvest. Even in the heat, the humidity is lighter, and the air has an edge of crisp to its presence.


We started our homeschool year on July 31st this year. Early for some, but three weeks into it, I know we made the right decision. The routine entering back into our daily schedule has been the missing element we all needed to return to. With the successful early start, we’ll be well on our way to a successful early finish, and plenty of breaks in the meantime.

Starting homeschool this year has brought a much-needed shift in our home. I couldn’t tell you what exactly, but I can tell you I can feel it.

We’ve got an eighth-grader and a fourth-grader this year, and I struggle to see how it’s possible that they’ve grown so much in so short of time. I remember our first homeschool day back in 2017 and how tiny they both were. Time is a thief. I can feel it.


The garden – what’s left of it after a devastating hailstorm in July – has been completely overrun by weeds. Pulling them at this point seems a frivolous waste of time – like I’m kidding myself it will ever be possible to manage.

The ground out in the garden went from being desolate and not able to support any life, to being overcome by it, and may I be as resolute as those weeds – determined to overcome any impossible landscape before me.

There are green beans, cucumbers, and some honey nut squash I’ve seen producing. I even picked one ripe tomato and one baby jalapeno. I’m not sure there will be an abundant harvest of anything this year, but I’m glad to have harvested anything at all.

There’s a simultaneous pull of excitement and despair when it comes to the garden. I can feel it, intensely, every time I step through the gate.


Then there’s the housework and homestead work which takes on a different feel this season. The flies are ridiculous and I hate them so much. Chicken butchering season is almost upon us – just a few weeks away.

But in everything that need to get done inside and out, this season of motherhood has been the biggest change I can feel.

I have a teenage daughter now, as well as a young man who is spending his last months in the single-digit-age era. Snuggles have largely been replaced by eyerolls and reluctant “yes ma’am”s. Messes have exploded not in size, but in frequency and complexity from their younger years.

Rather than an area of toys scattered about the floor, there is everything everywhere. Clothing, books, gadgets, tools, toys, blankets, food wrappers, dishes, shoes, papers, writing utensils…. everything is scattered over every horizontal surface in our home. In the clutter, which usually makes me feel tense and chaotic, I’ve found a hint of contentment.

Again, I’m not sure why, or even what it is. But I know I feel it.

Seasons of Change

So while we dance between seasons, I know a new one is on the horizon. I don’t know what it has in store, what it will entail, or how we’ll be expected to walk through it. But I can feel it waiting for us, and I’ll be ready when it gets here.

One Reply to “I Can Feel It”

  1. I can’t tell you how thrilled I was to see a new blog post from you! It has been a very hard week for me… and as I was getting my coffee this morning my husband said, “Val has a new post! “My heart felt a little lighter as I sat down with my hot cup of coffee and read your post!

    Hang in there! Children grow up far too quickly! It seems like yesterday I was in your shoes of homeschooling my own three children. We are currently empty-nesters, and this morning I am getting ready to babysit my 21 month old grandson! Don’t blink!

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