The Realities of Moving On

Seven years. For seven years I’ve been coming to this spot. On this particular outing, so many realities and emotions struck me, and it was hard for my mind to wrap around any one of them.

While Hubs was in South Dakota helping my sister and her family unload their moving truck, the kids came with me to a chiropractor appointment. It was right over the lunch hour, so afterward we grabbed a bite, and I had the idea to drive to the cemetery to eat.

I’ve done it so many times. I’ve eaten lunch alongside Harlynn’s grave more times than I can count. For seven years those trees rustling in the breeze have whispered their comforts and encouragement to me. The deer and the turkeys have been my company behind that iron gate fence.

And now we’re packing up, preparing to move away. Something I’ve done nearly second-nature for seven years is about to become something I won’t get to do save for once in a while.

I watched the kids as they crouched near their sister’s headstone, and then as they walked together after Little Man proposed, “Let’s go visit the other babies. ”

This is how they’re able to spend time with their sister. This is how they will remember their childhood with her, and what they will reflect on later in life.

After quite a while at Harlynn’s spot, Little Miss asked me if we could walk around the cemetery. I suggested she and Little Man start walking and I would follow behind them in the pickup. That way, they could walk as far as they felt up to and we wouldn’t have to stop to turn around and go back to the truck.

They started off, walking along the paths I’ve all but memorized in that cemetery. I followed behind them slowly, taking it all in.

“Cemeteries are actually peaceful and calming” chimed in Little Miss. I agree. There was a time I never wanted to set foot in one by choice, but now, I see them as far more inviting than simply as one’s last act.

I don’t know how to reconcile all the feelings and emotions I have about leaving Harlynn’s spot behind. I know she isn’t there. I know wherever we go, wherever we end up, she’ll be as much a part of our family there as she is here.

But still.

A trip I’ve been making regularly for the last seven years may now have more of a seven-year gap in between trips made.

And I suppose, when it comes down to it, I know this to be true: Our God is the God of the living. Jesus came to save so that whoever believes in Him will not perish.

Wherever we go, it will be following His leading. Whatever we leave behind will only be redeemed and returned all the more.

One Reply to “The Realities of Moving On”

  1. Hi Valerie. I knew you had left social media or was at least taking break. Frankly, I never could figure out how you were able to do as much as you did with everything you have going on! Anyway, I was lead to find your blog and see if you were at least keeping up with that and surprise! I discovered you were moving again! Congratulations! One of the first things I thought of was you having to leave Harlynn’s spot behind. 💗💗💗

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